热忱

 刚从奥克兰市中心的图书馆借了一本书-------哈佛凌晨四点半升级版, 其中有一篇文章我觉得应该把它记下来。

在哈佛大学，曾经有一个著名的实验： 心理学教授对1500为学生进行了调查，调查的题目是“你选择自己的专业，是因为自己的爱好，还是想在将来赚更多的钱？”

那些被调查的学生中，245人选择是由于自己的爱好，有1255人选择了赚钱。

这项调查一直持续了10年，其主要目的就是想了解为了个人爱好和为了金钱而努力奋斗的结果是怎样的。

10年之后，调查结果出来。为了金钱而学习工作的人，只有一位成为真正的富翁, 而因为个人的爱好而学习和工作的245人中，有116位为富翁。

我也想为爱好而奋斗，但是自己却不了解自己真正想要什么，有时候爱好变成工作也不是一件好事。会觉得那其实不是自己想要的。人类就是这么复杂。

这本书上说哈佛的研究结果让我们知道，能够改变你的命运，让你成为富翁的唯一出路，就是做你喜欢的东西，对学习永远都保持热忱。 对于我们喜欢的东西，我们都会很积极很投入地去学习，我十分的赞同，因为我是个学习狂热者。

偶尔看一些励志的书，对自己的影响是正面的。

Way to new journey

    I have made a very tough decision since beginning of this year. I decided to leave my parent to start my journey alone to place that I have never been before. It really need a lot of courage for me to make this decision because I am just a girl who hardly have any travel experience. But a sound amidst me, keep yelling at me. "I need to find the meaning of my life", I need to keep on moving to find something that fill my emptiness.

    I am a girl that like to stay at home, and do not like to go to crowded place and I am not outgoing at all. I would prefer to stay at home reading, play piano and surf net. Stay at home make me feel secure and safe. At the same time, I have complex character. I can be very extreme some time. I want myself to be tougher, able to stand under various circumstances and pressure. I am eager for success. However, I understand that success never come so easily. If you want success, you have to strive for it. Currently, I am too naive and I am too used to stay in my comfort zone. I know that if I do not step out of my comfort zone, I will forever stay at the same place and I will have no chance to learn to be independent. Only if we face difficulties, we grow stronger.

   My friends asked me to go with them on a working holiday to New Zealand. I did not go with them because if I follow them, I may not be able to meet my target, to be independent. I want to test my own ability, though it is a bit risky. I am quite blur, and it is dangerous for me travel alone. But to train myself under extreme circumstances, I have to gamble with my fate. Although the world outside is not as scary as I think. I am over exaggerate on backpacking alone.

   There are few reasons I did not follow them , the other reason is I lack of money. I need to pay my car loan, ptptn and raise a travel fund which my car loan will end next year May, need to settle this before I depart (^.^). And Australian work and holiday visa seems is much more harder to get, so I decided to go to Australia(Oz) first before I apply for New Zealand(NZ) working holiday. NZ working holiday can be applied through online so I can just apply online at Oz. Apply for the tougher first before go for the easier one.

   I was so lucky to get the visa which many peoples who queue up on application day did not manage to get it.  It really need a lot of hard work before apply for the visa and I am happy that my hard work paid off. Oz work and holiday only open for 100 peoples each year, which is very limited. This year the earliest people started to queue around 9pm a day before Oz high commission open for this visa application and the last peoples who managed to get the visa queue at around 3.40am. Which is few hours earlier compare to last year. This means for next year's application it will be much more tougher. You better queue around midnight. For those who plan to apply for next year's work and holiday visa, you really have to be well prepared.

  Back to my personal problem, because I will be traveling alone so I need more time to make sure everything is perfect. So I obtained my visa at July, I bought the ticket for next year April. At the same time, I will use this time to do research on what I should bring, types of backpack, shoes, clothes, need to work so that I have money to buy those that are essential (includes monitor currency rate) to my journey.

  Anyway, I have to step out my first step and now I am started to prepare for my journey. Can't wait to fly to my first destination. Wish myself good luck. :P

 

dragon zakura

Recently I have borrowed a Japanese drama from my Japanese language teacher. The drama's name is ドラゴンザクラ. To me it is a very good drama. As far as I know, Japanese have many meaningful and interesting drama. Normally the Japanese drama is short and the story wont keep repeating the same thing and thus won't be too boring.

It is about a poor lawyer who has received a case which is related to a high school that average mark of the student is only 36 and is called stupid high school. The school is facing financial problem as the student is decreasing every year. He decided to save the school by helping those student to get into top University in Tokyo. Although that is for his own benefit==.It is about the story of 6 students who studied very hard to achieve their target, University of Tokyo because they want to escape from to be called baka(stupid) again. But sadly, at last only 3 students manage to get in. The fate is unfair to some of them but because of the obstacle they faced, they grow. The method or the way they study is also very interesting, but I don't think I will follow :)

This drama make me think a lot. And when I was watching the drama, I feel that I am so lucky compare to those character. At least people in my surrounding won't treat me as a stupid person and I never face any serious obstacle, I can get anything I want easily and I feel that this is not good. I can't grow without obstacle, not sure whether this kind of thinking is good or bad. I think I am even stupid than them although I have been in good school since I was young. sweat...==;;; I never strive for any dream. To be success, the main quality is patience, determination and never give up. I lack of that :'( And I can't even know what I really want, I just follow what most peoples think is good.

Never give up!!Listen to your own will and your heart. Dont know how many time I have told myself like this but I have poor memory always forget to remind myself not to give up easily and work hard on one thing at a time. I can't hear any voice from my heart, sigh...

何かしなければならないと思ってるのに、そのあきらめなくて探すの意志がない。いつも簡単にあきられるのわたしがだいきらい。どうすればいい？

When my dream fly to the world

I used to have a pair of very strong and beautiful wing. It is able to bring me to every where. It gives me hope and dream. I used to be very happy and lived in fantasy world. My world was full of flowers and colours. I wished to go to every part of the world and collect peoples' story. I believe everyone have their own story. It is the memory when they are still alive and being a human. My dream was flying around.

But now, because of my greedy, my wing is hurt. I have been captured by my greediness. I cannot fly again. I can only stay in the same place doing nothing. Feeling life is meaningless.

Now, I am trying hard to make myself recover from my illness. At least I am still alive and there is so many things I can to do. Please do not give up. Appreciate every moment being a human. While this body still can function, I want to leave as much memory as I can to this world. There are still many parts of the world I have never been before. I want to know more about my world. So to fulfill my dream, I will never ever give up until my dream fly to the world, until I know the reason why I am here, my existence.

努力

今天，又到了上小提琴课的日子。老实说，我真的没什么练习到，被老师说教，真得很不甘心。其实，这也不能怪她，练了这么多年的小提琴，没什么进步到，要是我与这样的学生，我也会教的不爽。我老是提醒自己，一定要坚持每天练习，背好每一首曲子。但是，每天放工，就累得懒惰练习。我真的有很深的愧疚感， 我时常在怀疑我究竟是否喜欢小提琴，为何我还坚持学下去，如果不练习就只是浪费时间跟金钱而已。

想来我学了很多东西，就是没有一样精通。可以想到的都是老师们无奈的脸庞。天下没有不劳而获的事情，就算是天才也需要不断地练习，跟何况是我如此平凡的人。芭蕾舞是如此，小提琴是如此，语言也是如此。工作也要提起劲来。这样才会有一番作为，再向前走之前，还是应该反省反省，不要一昧的冲。

才华与梦想

最近又想起了小时候的梦想。感觉我人生中，每一个阶段的梦想都不一样。念小学的时候， 就很喜欢写故事，尤其是童话故事。总是有好多好多奇奇怪怪的想法冒出来，灵感犹如泉水般源源不绝。写过了很多故事，如今已忘了写过什么了。其后，又迷上了漫画。

以前的我，颇像野孩子，老是爱到处流浪，或者该说爱冒险，所以晒得像木炭一样黑。可是因为这样我的人生体验才这么的丰富。十岁那年，我已经是一只小书虫了，喜欢逛书店买书。从家里走了二十分钟才到达。有一天，我在书架上看到一本书，封面很美，喜欢画画的我，自然不会放过，把他买了下来。后来我才知道那是漫画，美少女战士。然后我又开始画漫画了。

曾经想过，长大之后要成为画家，漫画家，那时候，受爸爸的影响，喜欢中国文学，也爱作诗。那时候的自己，才华横溢，自信满棚，现在的我就很羡慕那时候的我，不知道挫折为何物。随着年纪的增长，那些梦想渐渐被遗忘。每一次听见“红蜻蜓”这首歌，都觉得有无限的感慨.

到了中学三年级，开始觉得江郎才尽了。我想大概是我迷上了芭蕾舞吧。不再提笔写作。
想不透，为什么我的才华渐渐消失了。最近，读到了一个美国作家的受访文章，说到写作，只要读，读，读，读多了，就会有很多新点子跑出来，写作也得心应手多了。对他来说，没有所谓的天才。想想也时，天才如果没有努力，也无法出人头地。就算是莫扎特也要勤于练习，才能拥有这么多巨作。上天其实也是公平的，一个人不能太贪心，梦想太多，最后也是一事无成。

长大了，变得越来越现实。以前最受不了铜臭味，现在却不得不向现实低头。芭蕾舞是一个昂贵的梦想，也是最难实现的梦想。然而，我却为芭蕾舞执著到了现在。到现在还不想放弃，对于芭蕾的欲望越来越强。

可笑的事，拥有这么多梦想的我，现在却是一名需要理性思考的工程师。上个星期，连追了好几部电视剧。有意不让我体会到，即使生命只有一瞬间，曾绽放过就不会有遗憾。从以前就在想，希望可以创作出感动世人的作品。对我来说，只有艺术才能令人感动。比如莫扎特， 英年早逝，但是却为后人赞叹，若我能如此，心已足矣。生命不在乎长短，只在乎是否有意义。就应为如此，我在工作中常常感到迷惘。艺术的路是那么的坎坷，我是否能承受呢，我要的是什么，这也是我必须考虑的一个问题。因为，青春短暂，我已不能再浪费生命了。

有一个名人也说过，人生最冒险的事就是你从来不冒险。我自以为我老是爱选最难走的路来走。其实不是的，我并没有自己想得那样勇于冒险。我选择的是，可以让我的生活安逸的路。

目前还在为生活奋斗中。。。。。该何去何从呢？

随意

1。 好久都没有以华文来写文章了。自上大学以来，用的都是马来文和英文，后来又热衷于外语，如西班牙文和日文，都快忘了小时候学华文的感动了。以前最爱中国文学，爱古诗，热衷于写作。故事总是很自然的从指尖流露出来。可谓是左右逢源，而今却灵感不再，连中文该怎么写都快忘了。真是不该啊。

2。 最近，因为假期，追了两部动画，恶作剧之吻和梦色蛋糕师。好向往他们的生活，然后发现动画的主角们，之所以可以成功，都是靠恒心跟毅力，而这些正是我所缺少的。我缺少了成功最重要的元素，总是埋怨生活太过单调无聊，其实只要改变想法，就会发现身边有很多机会，世界也会更开阔。思想改变了，生活自然而然的也会跟着改变。让单调的生活奏起充满色彩的交响诗章吧！不要让将来的自己后悔过去。不要再把自己关在狭小的牢笼里，展开翅膀飞向世界各地吧！

3。 看着这些动画，旧时的梦想又开始蠢蠢欲动了。音乐，舞蹈，艺术，故事， 想透过这些将感动带给大家。我认为不能再为自己的梦想找借口了，时间不留任。我不能太贪心，追求太多，会迷失方向，努力使自己成为更加完美的人吧。浪费了二十多年的时间了，不能再浪费下去了。加油吧，一定要成为最耀眼的主角。